Equinox Luxury Fitness Club didn't want your fat asses joining on New Year's Day

Equinox Luxury Fitness Club got a lot of blowback for their "We don't speak January" campaign on their website, blocking new members from joining on New Year's Day. Their website was plastered with the their campaign message all over their site, preventing new people from buying a membership.
ELFC said they're not the gym for members to join on New Year's Day, and then drop out by the middle of the month. They say life doesn't start on January 1 - despite the promises of a new year - and neither does ELFC. They're looking for lifetime members who will stay loyal to the brand - not just something to cross off your 'New Year's Resolutions List' in which you won't stick with past January 15. Take that fat asses ! Go waste time at Planet Fitness or LA Fitness - but not Equinox, you bitches !
The blowback was fierce on their social media. One interested client called the campaign "super cringe and pointless," and another said, "I hate equinox for many reasons, but this is definitely a new low."
| by Anonymous | reply 68 | January 5, 2023 3:13 AM |
Why do I rarely if ever hear great things about Equinox?
| by Anonymous | reply 1 | January 2, 2023 9:49 PM |
Alternative title: Social media idiots give Equinox exactly what they want
| by Anonymous | reply 2 | January 2, 2023 9:50 PM |
What’s a luxury fitness club?
Are the weights made of gold?
| by Anonymous | reply 4 | January 2, 2023 9:55 PM |
Good for them.
Processing both memberships and cancellations takes a lot of time and money. They probably have a lot of data showing that people who sign up during January don't last more than a couple months and rarely come after the first week.
I went to the gym today, and it was the most crowded it's been in a long time, filled with people who clearly had no idea what they were doing, but taking up space and equipment.
| by Anonymous | reply 6 | January 2, 2023 9:55 PM |
R4 - if you have to ask, it's certainly not for you. Move on to the local YMCA.
| by Anonymous | reply 8 | January 2, 2023 10:00 PM |
Both humble-bragging and virtue-signalling.
| by Anonymous | reply 9 | January 2, 2023 10:01 PM |
I know a lot of fitness resolutions fade away, but the New Year is a good time to join a gym because there's usually deals.
| by Anonymous | reply 10 | January 2, 2023 10:02 PM |
R8 lives in a 4th floor walk-up studio he shares with 4 other people because they can't afford a decent apartment on their own, what with all of their Equinox Gym dues.
Shop bottoms don't usually make a lot of money.
| by Anonymous | reply 11 | January 2, 2023 10:04 PM |
R11 - Speaking of which, you still owe your fifth of the rent for January, sweetie. What's taking you so long to cough up a hundred bucks ?
| by Anonymous | reply 12 | January 2, 2023 10:09 PM |
[quote]I know a lot of fitness resolutions fade away, but the New Year is a good time to join a gym because there's usually deals.
That’s what I don’t understand about this business model. For a luxury gym, they could sell one year memberships and who cares if the “new” people show up? It doesn’t make any sense from a business perspective.
| by Anonymous | reply 13 | January 2, 2023 10:16 PM |
They have the best steam rooms. You have to admit.
| by Anonymous | reply 14 | January 2, 2023 10:16 PM |
They were hoping for this social media reaction. Cheaper than an expensive ad campaign and more effective.
| by Anonymous | reply 15 | January 2, 2023 10:17 PM |
If I recall, Equinox & Pelaton are owned by people who gave money to Trump, so why join their gym anytime?
| by Anonymous | reply 16 | January 2, 2023 10:33 PM |
Well, someone mentioned the steam room.
| by Anonymous | reply 17 | January 2, 2023 10:34 PM |
I would guess that a very fair number of the people that die in a health club (from acute myocardial infarction, etc.) are those that join in January. That would be a very interesting study to do, but from the half-a-dozen deaths that I know about at my club over the last 40 years, 3 or 4 of them were new years resolution folks. That's hardly a statistical model, but there it is.
| by Anonymous | reply 18 | January 2, 2023 10:41 PM |
[quote]Processing both memberships and cancellations takes a lot of time and money. They probably have a lot of data showing that people who sign up during January don't last more than a couple months and rarely come after the first week.
It's a gym membership, not a mortgage application. The only complexity involved is deliberate: gyms want to make it difficult for you to cancel.
People who join a gym in January then stop using the gym but keep paying for it are good for the fitness industry. They're purchasing a service that they won't use. But those people are never going to sign up for Equinox, which costs $200 a month at least.
What Equinox is doing is advertising to dedicated gym goers who want to avoid the New Years resolution crowd: this is the place for the elite like you who go six days a week, so why are you wasting your time at Crunch?
| by Anonymous | reply 19 | January 2, 2023 10:43 PM |
It’s not a very good business decision to forfeit all those dollars. They’re not going to last very long.
| by Anonymous | reply 21 | January 2, 2023 10:48 PM |
R19 has a point. There is market for the hardcore - who are usually bunched in with more casual gym crowds and the people who join, go two times, and then stop.
I wasn't going to outright join a gym this week - I'm already a member at one- but rather change gyms in light of the deals to be had.
| by Anonymous | reply 22 | January 2, 2023 10:48 PM |
Equinox's ad is right up their alley, and this is why: Every January, my gym gets crowded with resolutionists. They are annoying tacky bitches who don't understand gym etiquette, or how to swim in a shared lane, or how not to brush their teeth in the shower. They crowd out loyal members and I've stayed away from my gym for a few weeks early in the year because I don't want to deal with it.
Equinox wants snobby yet committed members who 'get' what Equinox is about, which is mostly exclusivity. They don't want erstwhile members - rather they want steady income - and they don't want to waste their time with n00bs now, or later when they want to cancel. Equinox is basically signaling to current and future members that they aren't looking for casual members.
| by Anonymous | reply 23 | January 3, 2023 12:01 AM |
Equinox showers are the best in the world. THE. BEST.
You pay for a lot of amenities and mostly they are worth it.
The Luxury Clubs ( I think there is one in Century City and one in Hudson Yards that is connected to the Hotel). They are total bullshit.
| by Anonymous | reply 24 | January 3, 2023 12:15 AM |
I want to head back to the gym but covid is still here fucking with us.
| by Anonymous | reply 25 | January 3, 2023 12:19 AM |
r25 I have gone to the gym 3-4 days a week for the last six months now, never wear a mask, and I haven't caught COVID there. I've got all the recommended boosters. Just mentioning it.
| by Anonymous | reply 26 | January 3, 2023 12:40 AM |
It’s probably a pain in the ass for fitness clubs. I don’t know why some people do this year after year
| by Anonymous | reply 27 | January 3, 2023 1:24 AM |
I love the Equinox bathrooms. But in NYC, I find the guys at Crunch to be generally hotter and more masculine. I can’t stand most of Equinox clientele in NYC. Too many fobby Asian and Indian guys, along with shop bottom white twinks, who are otherwise ironically just as basic as the demographic that Equinox is always bashing.
| by Anonymous | reply 28 | January 3, 2023 1:39 AM |
^ don’t forget overly eccentric euro-trash wannabes
| by Anonymous | reply 29 | January 3, 2023 1:41 AM |
[quote]Processing both memberships and cancellations takes a lot of time and money.
Horseshit.
If they have a reasonably decent CRM the whole thing can be automated from cancellation request to request fulfillment.
| by Anonymous | reply 30 | January 3, 2023 1:51 AM |
[quote] They have the best steam rooms. You have to admit.
Yup, some of the best head I’ve ever had in NYC. Pretty much guaranteed boner land.
| by Anonymous | reply 31 | January 3, 2023 2:26 AM |
Smart campaign. The target demographic of Equinox is the arrogant.
| by Anonymous | reply 32 | January 3, 2023 2:29 AM |
Oh, please. The gym business model is predicated on a certain percentage of members who almost never use the facilities.
And places like Equinox don’t make it easy to cancel. You get hit with cancellation fees and often have to cancel by a certain date more than a month in advance in order to avoid paying for that month.
They would love to have people sign up in January, never use it, then try to cancel a few months later.
| by Anonymous | reply 33 | January 3, 2023 2:32 AM |
When I owned my business (1987-2011) I had a similar business model as Equinox: quality not quantity. My store wasn't for everyone, and I wasn't going after every dollar. I was going after quality customers - those who appreciated my merchandise and the shopping experience as opposed to 'every customer'.
Equinox's dreadful day is January 1, when 'quantity' comes running into the health club to sign up. My dreaded day was always December 26 - when 'quantity' came running through my doors asking "Is everything on sale ? Where's the sale stuff? " They would be so angry when I told them no - nothing was on sale. (I did a sale the last two weeks of January for my quality customers).
Equinox got it right - leave the riff raff for the other gyms.
| by Anonymous | reply 34 | January 3, 2023 2:35 AM |
Is the gym membership really 30 grand per year?
| by Anonymous | reply 35 | January 3, 2023 2:52 AM |
The wording of their message is bad and makes them seem like arrogant assholes, which they kind of are. I know that all press is good press most of the time, but I'll bet they didn't expect this kind of negative reaction.
| by Anonymous | reply 37 | January 3, 2023 3:41 AM |
“Are we exclusionary? Absolutely!”
| by Anonymous | reply 38 | January 3, 2023 4:23 AM |
30 grand annual membership is exclusionary
| by Anonymous | reply 39 | January 3, 2023 5:53 AM |
R37 Equinox's brand is arrogant assholes. Oddly enough, the Ayn Rand mentality is mostly in its corporate structure. I used to be a trainer there and my clients were friendly, for the most part. Leadership was a nightmare.
| by Anonymous | reply 41 | January 3, 2023 1:36 PM |
I haven’t been to a gym since COVID. Instead, I started running again and bought a relatively cheap set of dumbbells and a barbell w/plates to recreate my old gym workouts.
Since doing this, I’ve maintained my fitness. Best of all, I’ve been able to avoid EVERY gym asshole, including:
The exercised-obsessed idiots who think going to a crowded gym will help them “sweat out” a cold/flu/COVID (these are by far the WORST and most selfish people out there)
The cell phone yappers who treat the treadmills as their own personal phone booth (and who the HELL are you gossiping with at 6 am???)
The muscleheads who think they own the weight room and drape their sweaty towels and smelly tank tops over equipment/benches to deter anyone else from using it
The indoor cycling instructors who confuse screaming for “motivation”!!
The cult like followers of certain Yoga instructors who line up like lemmings at the door of the group fitness room 30 minutes before their guru’s class begins, who start crashing through the door 10 minutes before the class in progress ends ends so that they can get “THEIR SPOT” on the floor
The locker room slobs (esp the ones who sit on benches without putting a towel under their naked asses—ewww)
The daily gymgoer who puts on the same workout clothes EVERY DAY, washing them only 1x per week (yeah, we can smell you!)
The front desk supervisor who blasts rap music so loud you can’t hear yourself think
…and so on.
The New Years newbies are delightful compared to the regulars. So suck it, Equinox!
| by Anonymous | reply 42 | January 3, 2023 3:18 PM |
They absolutely are arrogant assholes. Demonstrated in every way every day.
| by Anonymous | reply 43 | January 3, 2023 3:35 PM |
Another one who belonged to a gym for 25+ years and during the pandemic realized I could buy a few pieces of inexpensive equipment and replicate the experience at home.
| by Anonymous | reply 44 | January 3, 2023 3:37 PM |
I also used to resent those who briefly showed up in January or pre-summer and clogged the gym.
But then I realized, without people like them who purchase memberships no rarely use them, people like me would be paying a lot more.
| by Anonymous | reply 45 | January 3, 2023 3:39 PM |
[quote]but I'll bet they didn't expect this kind of negative reaction
Are you seriously that naive? This is the exact reaction they wanted.
| by Anonymous | reply 46 | January 3, 2023 3:50 PM |
[quote] Instead, I started running again
Why you running? Someone chasing you?
Don’t worry, we’ll get a bunch of us together and beat their asses for you. Cause you sexy.
| by Anonymous | reply 47 | January 3, 2023 6:20 PM |
Never been to a gym since I was in my teens. Do the 'muscle hunks' show off their dicks in the locker rooms ?
| by Anonymous | reply 48 | January 3, 2023 6:24 PM |
r47 He wouldn't wear the ribbon
| by Anonymous | reply 49 | January 3, 2023 8:05 PM |
Gym memberships seem like a waste of money. You pay, then you have to drive over there, drive back, maybe get some coffee at a Starbucks, wait for equipment, deal with other people's hygiene and habits. On top of that, I would feel compelled to look somewhat presentable at the gym. If you work out at home, you can dress any way you like, drink your own coffee, use your own shower, etc.
| by Anonymous | reply 50 | January 3, 2023 8:09 PM |
True R50 but some people want/need to physically go to a gym to get out of the house. Especially if they work at home. Or if they’re around their significant other too long and need to get away from them.
| by Anonymous | reply 51 | January 3, 2023 8:19 PM |
r26, it’s quite likely you’ve had Covid with mild to no symptoms, maybe more than once. And spread it all over.
| by Anonymous | reply 52 | January 3, 2023 8:25 PM |
Covid is a squirrelly bitch, best stay out of its way.
| by Anonymous | reply 53 | January 3, 2023 8:35 PM |
I see you, r49. I see you and am rolling.
| by Anonymous | reply 54 | January 3, 2023 8:41 PM |
R40 I sold European bath and body toiletries as well as European fragrances and candles - nothing you could find in my area, nothing in the department stores or discount stores. At the time, none of it was available on the internet either - until 2010-11, which is when I decided to close after 24 years.
| by Anonymous | reply 56 | January 3, 2023 9:29 PM |
[quote] Never been to a gym since I was in my teens. Do the 'muscle hunks' show off their dicks in the locker rooms ?
Not to men who haven’t been in a gym in decades.
| by Anonymous | reply 59 | January 3, 2023 9:42 PM |
Gyms and WW are two places to stay away from until March. When I was a WW member, the place would be damn near empty between Dec 15 and Dec 31. Once the new year started, it was SRO until about March. Then you could get a seat.
Pre-COVID (2018-19), my studio had attendance on Saturday mornings (8 am meeting) of 50 - 60 people. Once they opened back up, you had to log in and reserve a spot because attendance was limited to about 20-25.
| by Anonymous | reply 62 | January 3, 2023 9:52 PM |
Equinox is $330 a month. I should call them and ask if they're doing those $10 / month specials for newbies.
| by Anonymous | reply 63 | January 3, 2023 9:53 PM |
Equinox already requires a 12-month initial commitment to join.
| by Anonymous | reply 64 | January 3, 2023 10:46 PM |
Yeah R64 but it’s easy to get out of. Just lie and say you are moving away. I’ve done it a few times.
| by Anonymous | reply 65 | January 3, 2023 10:48 PM |
^For that price, ask them if it comes with a daily blow job. If they’re being honest they’ll tell you that it does.
| by Anonymous | reply 66 | January 3, 2023 11:22 PM |
Given the typical Equinox member, yeah a daily blow job is pretty much a given
| by Anonymous | reply 67 | January 4, 2023 12:06 AM |
[quote] ^For that price, ask them if it comes with a daily blow job. If they’re being honest they’ll tell you that it does.
Yes, it literally does. It’s the best.
| by Anonymous | reply 68 | January 5, 2023 3:13 AM |
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